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IC Thread Colin's Seeking

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Post by Anja Rebekka Schultze Sun Nov 08, 2015 3:14 pm

Alica looked at what you where drawing she took a careful step closer.
"I...I remember...this thing...I was terrified...someone taught me to...console me I...remember."
She muttered she stepped a bit closer still and you notice that while she is distracted the ship have stopped attacking The Shara. Suddenly the Handler realize her mind have wandered though and she shake her head.
"No...whatever former lives I have lived, they do not matter. I know in one I went through the Cauls but for some reason when I was born my Avatar was no longer fully inverted but that was fixed soon enough, nothing of this matter I have one task, one reason for being."
The girl said as if to remind herself.
"I need to kill you and be done with you!"
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Post by Warpmind Sun Nov 08, 2015 5:49 pm

Colin sidestepped calmly, keeping himself just out of reach of the blade while Alice still refrained from rushing him. "None of it matters? Surely your dark angel disagrees with that; he's experienced more than you, seen things you could not even imagine... He lives in you to see more yet, until your time together comes to an end. Beatrice loved to paint, bleak oblivionscapes shaded in her own blood; are you saying you lack such artistic appreciations? Come on, what harm could it do to draw on the knowledge and memories of someone so much older and wiser than yourself?"
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Post by Anja Rebekka Schultze Sun Nov 08, 2015 6:08 pm

"Well he...he do not talk much to me outside of Seekings...only feelings at times...images."
The Handler said as she glared at the Orphan.
"Painting...perhaps I...well I see images but I have never been allowed to do such thing, I exist just to soothe the ship and get it to do as the captain wants, that is my only purpose."
Alice said and looked away.
"I do not know how to paint."
The girl look hesitant.
"You are distracting me...I should kill you...I should kill you now!"
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Post by Warpmind Sun Nov 08, 2015 9:42 pm

Colin shrugged, "Do you know what Beatrice said once? She said she wanted a personal Descent; to dive into Oblivion itself, for her Avatar and herself to join in nothingness... I imagine you yourself feel this pull, do you not? A wish to leave this world behind and completely cease?"
He smiled, holding up the notebook, the circle facing Alice, a finger pressed into the center, "Scoria expurgate. Your Avatar would remember this, I believe? Imagine how cleansing it might feel if you cast it with more strength behind it... Like, say, the power of this vessel?"

((OOC: Yes, Colin is gambling on the ship using that rote with extra power behind it to clear out every nook and cranny of loose bits with cleansing Primal fire; all the Nephandi on board and, well, himself in the process. A fair trade, wouldn't you say? Wink ))
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Post by Anja Rebekka Schultze Sun Nov 08, 2015 10:23 pm

Alice looked at Colin then she nodded.
"Yes...I do feel the pull you speak of, I do eventually want to stop existing, to never having existed, entering into complete oblivion, why do you ask me about this though?"
The little girl asked and took a step forward clothing her dagger.
"The power of this vessel...to do so would kill everything on board, yourself the crew and me and most likely the ship itself, it do have a pretty big Quintessence depository after all."
The Handler said in a threatening tone of voice.
"I walk the spiral path I am not suicidal, there is a difference."
Alice said before she looked away from you.
"Agh you are infuriating I should have killed you already..."
She said but some part of her did not seam to want to kill you, not yet at least.
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Post by Warpmind Sun Nov 08, 2015 10:41 pm

Colin smiled wryly, "You're not the first to say so... There've been a few, hm, colleagues of mine who voiced similar opinions in a moment of frustration. Some I even consider friends. For that matter, on one spectacular occasion, I even managed to infuriate a rock. A completely mundane, inanimate chunk of stone. Of course, that was following a rather spectacular Paradox backlash, so I suppose that doesn't quite count..."
He circled a little further, "But alright, let's change the subject for a moment... Since my life is essentially forfeit, I'm rather curious as to how, precisely, you handle this vessel. Is it some manner of telepathic link? Perhaps blood control, seeing as your Avatar, at least, used to belong to a Verbena? Or is it perhaps that fine throne of yours that manages the link in its entirety, and you just have some rapport with the creature?"
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Post by Anja Rebekka Schultze Mon Nov 09, 2015 5:33 am

Alice look at you when you speak about infuriating a rock and despite herself she smiles then she quickly regain control, this child had never been given love, never been given friends she had been given a task to do and only that. The Handler follow you as your circle around her, always keeping her eyes on you.
"Why do you ask how I control the polyp?"
The girl asked.
"What do it matter to you?"
The Handler hissed.
"We where joined on a spiritual level if you must know, so he follow my will and I feel his emotions and pain."
The girl explained.
"These ships are so wast, so alien that without a human translator it is not possible to understand them, to work with them, then they would just leave back into the deepest part of the Umbra where they belong. That is why I am important."
The little girl said proudly.
"And that is why I have to focus on continuing the assault instead of wasting my time with you, damned it, I could use my magick to just snap your neck...why have I not done so...why do I...hesitate? I have never hesitated in taking a life before, it is fun. But every time to decide to get it done with you I see you...putting a flower in my hair. Who the hell are you, who do something in me not want to kill you!"
The little girl screamed at you, holding her knife in a trembling hand.
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Post by Warpmind Mon Nov 09, 2015 8:45 am

"Why do I ask? I'm simply curious; I also find that most people find some satisfaction in educating others, as it were."
Colin smiled, "Ah, yes, the Helen Cushing rose... I gave that to Beatrice the night they tried to tear your Avatar apart... it gave her something to focus on, to grip at to hold herself together. I never did learn the magic of Life, but..."
He drew on the memory, tore a page from his notebook, and curled it up between his hands, turning the ball of paper into a replica of the rose from so many years ago; artificial, sure, but not so you could tell by sight alone. "I'm afraid the rosebush was lost twenty years ago... The same night Beatrice died, in fact. She was such a sweet girl, you know... kindly, if a little morbid. She really wanted to revert her Avatar to its former glory; she really tried..."
Carefully, keeping an eye on the knife, Colin placed the faux rose in Alice's hair, gently tying it into a lock of hair.
"Perhaps your reluctance is because, on some level, you remember me treating you kindly, without hostility for the circumstances of your birth?"
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Post by Anja Rebekka Schultze Mon Nov 09, 2015 9:00 am

Alice glanced at the Orphan, anger still in her eyes but also something else, she was curious, curious about this man who seamed to stir up something inside of her, something she did not want but something that still forced itself into the foreground of her consciousness. The little girl look at you as you make the paper rose and she stepped closer though her knife was not raised this time and she did not seam to be fully in control of her actions.
"I...I remember...it was a symbol...to make me fight...to make it fight...it saved me."
The little girl muttered, then as you place the paper rose in her hair the girl looked up at you, the knife slipping from her tiny fingers and embedding itself in the fleshy floor as she was overwhelmed by the throwback to an earlier life, and earlier life where she cared deeply for the man before her. As the little Nephandus lost focus on the here and now the ship stopped attacking and you hear an explosion somewhere as if the polyp's defenses to went down as the mage controlling it's mind wandered.
"I...I...am the Handler of this ship...that is my purpose to serve the Black Spiral I..."
The girl muttered as she looked up at you, confused and in the grip of a throwback as angry orders in the Nephandi language was being yelled over a speaker system of some sort, apparently someone was not pleased that the Handler had stopped controlling the polyp.
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Post by Warpmind Mon Nov 09, 2015 9:24 am

Colin gently reached out and gave Alice a hug; like a kindly uncle who sees his niece for the first time in years, patting her head gently, "Is that a purpose you've chosen for yourself, or a task you've been told is your purpose, hmmm? You are a child of twelve, not a soldier with decades of experience; you should not have been forced to the front lines like this."
A small gesture toward the speakers, and Colin laid a small, silencing bubble around them - a simple dampening effect he and Freddy had created for the video game room, so the kids wouldn't be bothered by the sound of explosions while they napped...
"You should see the worlds like a child, ever discovering new things through play, rather than like a sad, old adult."
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Post by Anja Rebekka Schultze Mon Nov 09, 2015 9:42 am

"I was found before my second birthday by the Nephandi looking for widderslainte and I was brought to a Labyrinth and trained, it was there it was discovered I could be linked with a Battle Cruiser and they operated on me, linking my Avatar to the ship."
The girl said matter of factly though there where pain in her big blue eyes.
"From that day on my purpose was to control this ship and nothing else, I was no longer called by name, I am not just the Handler."
Alice said and looked away.
"It do not matter what I want, it is what the beings I worship demand of me, or rather the older Nephandi who can hear them clearly, they have set my course."
The Handler said.
"I am a Nephandus, my age do not matter, I will fight."
Alice said though right now the polyp was not doing much fighting, in fact it seams to have lost interest in both The Shara and Horizon and was slowly turning and adjusting it's course to go...wherever it was such an abomination might want to go and every now and again the ship shook as the Traditionalist ships got in hits on the now more or less inert ship. The ship's commander or whoever it was on the other end of the speaker system was screaming in rage at Alice but she heard nothing when your rote was in effect.
"I am what I am..."
Alice muttered then she looks up at you again.
"Do you regret it. I do not remember everything but I do remember the rose you gave that woman you are speaking about, the one I once was, that rose saved her, gave her enough strength to fight...do you regret giving it to her now, if her Avatar had been destroyed back then, it would not have been reborn in me and I would not be here controlling a ship to attack Horizon. So do you regret saving her?"
The little girl asked, her eyes was full of emotion but her face was kept in a hard mask as she waited for your reply.
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Post by Warpmind Mon Nov 09, 2015 9:56 am

Colin shook his head, "No, I don't... Beatrice got to live a little longer, and she got to try to revert her Avatar; if she hadn't been killed when the Technocracy attacked, she might well have succeeded; we'll never know. Had your Avatar been destroyed, I would have lost a dear friend, in so many ways. Instead, I've now had the fortune to meet, in part, that old friend again."
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Post by Anja Rebekka Schultze Mon Nov 09, 2015 10:06 am

The Handler look at you, a tear rolled down her cheek.
"You are a Traditionalist and you do not wish my Avatar had been destroyed, even when you had the chance for it to be, even with the consequences of leaving it be?"
The girl asked.
"P...perhaps you really aren't my enemy after all."
The little Nephandus said.
"But I am ordered to destroy Horizon, you must hate me for that, I have no choice but obey and rip the realm apart."
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Post by Warpmind Mon Nov 09, 2015 10:15 am

Colin shook his head, "No, I do not wish we'd done things differently back then... We'd just learned it was possible to undo what the Caul did; if a soul can be saved, it's a disservice to everyone and everything to destroy it instead. I can't even hate you for doing what you must. All I can do is honor my friend..."
A tear rolled down his cheek as Colin pulled the knife out of the floor and jabbed it into Alice's back, just below her left shoulderblade to pierce heart and lung, a slight twist in the wound. "And she would not want to live as a tool of destruction. I'm so sorry, but I have to save those I can, at all costs. Without you, this thing will retreat, or be shot down... Yours will be my last ghost, I expect."
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Post by Anja Rebekka Schultze Mon Nov 09, 2015 10:32 am

The Handler looks up at you she did not seam to understand all that you where saying, but her Avatar remembered you, and in her confusing of the emotions and the throwback to an earlier life she did not see you picking up the knife. The little girl gave a sharp gasp when you stabbed her, you do not know if she feel pain, but you think the stock of the wound are the great for there to be much of it. Alice gasped again, this time trying to draw breath, her eyes where wide wish shock and confusion, then she went limp against you, though you feel her tiny hand holding onto your shirt in one hard grip as she stopped breathing and her eyes closed.

As the Handler died, the ship lost what little control it had, this spirit, for really that is what it was, who belonged in the deep umbra and who could not understand this strange, more structural reality without a translator. Bergamott over at The Shara wasted no time in opening fire on the battle cruiser and the polyp without it's shields and protections where very vulnerable. You hear the ship scream, and then you see a blinding light, and then there where nothing...

For a moment you float in nothing, your mind full of the lessons you had just been trough, your Avatar letting you interpret the lesson yourself, a lesson of love and sacrifice but also that while you would one day would become a powerful mage, your greatest gift where your caring, and the way your care giving affected others...and then...you where back in your own body, the Mindscape fading from view but not from memory.
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